the 10s approacheth…

30 12 2009

I submitted my University of Miami application this morning.

All that remains of the grad school work to be done is to revise my personal statement for Brown and submit that application, which is but the work of a couple hours at most. I’m going to finish at least the personal statement before I leave work today, and grad school work and worry will be a thing of the past by this time tomorrow.

Which is excellent, since I have just made plans to be fly with Murray on New Year’s Eve. It’s somewhat of a tradition, after all. Except for last year, when I fell asleep before midnight because I had a 5am shift on the 1st (another thing 2009 has happily relegated to the past!!), I have made it a point to spend my NYE with Murray ever since ’06/’07, when her quiet celebration and the smashing of plates set the tone in no small part for the utterly transformational year to follow.

And though none of the years since have captured quite the same magic, this year has more than earned a thankful night of debauchery and engendered plenty of hope for the one to come.

I will start 2010 with a hip new flat, a great job, and several vacations (not to mentions graduate school) on the horizon. For once this New Year’s I have every reason to believe things will only get better and better.

Jesus, what a year. What a fucking decade. I remember sitting in this same florescent cave last year, wishing to be anywhere else, nursing what seemed like an eternal ache left behind by all my friends who left the city, and blogging about what a shitty fucking year it was. I rested my hope for 2009 not on any physical evidence, but on the Year of the Ox.

My year. And looking back, it definitely has been. It may not have been the brightest or the loudest year I remember. It was not always the most fun. But it has certainly seen a complete turnaround from the broke, apathetic, perpetually lonely slacker of 2008 to the productive, stable and thoroughly content slacker I am today.

All the things that sucked about this year turned out in the end to be what made it great. At the start of the year I was feeling overworked: the mountain getaway served to remind me how much I can put up with as long as I get a decent vacation with good friends every once in a while. I felt like the world was ending when I had a brush with lay-offs in April, but riding the unemployment train made it quite a carefree summer including our epic SC trip…and here I am 8 months later with a full-time gig.

Moving out of 1722 was something I had never wanted to do, and I probably wouldn’t have if I hadn’t been on the rocks financially. But in the end, we ditched the annoying roommate, I paid off my car debt to the rents and now I am using my savings to move into an comparably awesome place with two well-vetted friends. (RIP that roof, though, seriously.)

But forget 2009: I remember the person I was in 1999, although I wasn’t blogging about it then. Friendless, hopelessly quiet, desperate to be a different person, in a different body, with a different personality and different desires, painfully conscious of what others might think of me.

This decade I fell in and out of love. I was in a fucking 5 year relationship for chrissakes. And from the rubble of that train wreck I built mass of friends, a whole new person, a life.

There’s obviously a lot to reflect on. But I’ll cease trying your patience with it here. Inevitably I’ll have more to say tomorrow while I watch the clock eke towards 9, and parties, and merriment, and 20fucking10.

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